from Inc Magazine
Happiness--in your business life and your personal life--is often a matter of subtraction, not addition.
Consider, for example, what happens when you stop doing the following 10 things:
So you blame them for your problems.
But you're also to blame.
Maybe you didn't provide enough training.
Maybe you didn't build in enough of a buffer.
Maybe you asked too much, too soon.
Taking responsibility - it's empowering--you can control the agenda and do things better the next time
clothes, cars , possessions, titles, accomplishments - are "things." - People may like your things - it doesn't mean they like you!
Build genuine relationships make you happier, and you'll only form genuine relationships when you stop trying to impress and start trying to just be yourself.
An absence of fear or insecurity isn't happiness: It's just an absence of fear or insecurity.
Holding on to what you think you need won't make you happier; letting go so you can reach for and try to earn what you want will. Even if you don't succeed in earning what you want, the act of trying alone will make you feel better about yourself.
Interrupting isn't just rude. When you interrupt someone, what you're really saying is,
"I'm not listening to you so I can understand what you're saying; I'm listening to you so I can decide what I want to say."
Want people to like you? Listen to what they say. Focus on what they say. Ask questions to make sure you understand what they say.
They'll love you for it--and you'll love how that makes you feel.
Whining about your problems makes you feel worse, not better.
If something is wrong, don't waste time complaining. Put in that effort to make the situation better.
Fix it now.
Don't talk about what's wrong. Talk about how you'll make things better, even if that conversation is only with yourself.
And do the same with your friends or colleagues. Don't just be the shoulder they cry on.
Friends don't let friends whine--friends help friends make their lives better.
Yeah, you're the boss. Yeah, you're the titan of industry. Yeah, you're the small tail that wags a huge dog.
Still, the only thing you really control is you.
If you find yourself trying hard to control other people, you've decided that you, your goals, your dreams, or even just your opinions are more important than theirs.
Control is short term it requires force, or fear, or authority, or some form of pressure--none of those let you feel good about yourself.
Find people who want to go where you're going.
They'll work harder, have more fun, and create better business and personal relationships. And all of you will be happier.
7. Criticizing. Yeah, you're more educated. Yeah, you're more experienced. Yeah, you've been around more blocks and climbed more mountains and slayed more dragons.
That doesn't make you smarter, or better, or more insightful.That just makes you you: unique, matchless, one of a kind, but in the end, just you.
Just like everyone else--including your employees.
Everyone is different: not better, not worse, just different.
Appreciate the differences instead of the shortcomings and you'll see people--and yourself--in a better light.
Learn from your mistakes. Then let it go.
When another person makes a mistake, see that as an opportunity to be kind, forgiving, and understanding.
The past is just training; it doesn't define you.
Think about what went wrong, but only in terms of how you will make sure that, next time, you and the people around you will know how to make sure it goes right.
So it's easier to hesitate, to wait for the right moment, to decide we need to think a little longer or do some more research or explore a few more alternatives.
Meanwhile days, weeks, months, and even years pass us by.
And so do our dreams.
Don't let your fears hold you back. Whatever you've been planning, whatever you've imagined, whatever you've dreamed of, just do it today.
If you want to start a business, take the first step. If you want to change careers, take the first step. If you want to expand or enter a new market or offer new products or services, take the first step.
Put your fears aside and get started. Do something. Do anything.
Otherwise, today is gone. Once tomorrow comes, today is lost forever.